Breaking up sucks. How to survive a breakup? It's tough. When you break up, your whole identity is smashed to pieces. It feels like death and it hurts.
Immense pain in your heart, crying yourself to sleep at night, and feeling a profound sense of loss are all normal experiences after a breakup. There is a huge void in your life now. This empty hole is uncomfortable and is filled with pain.
It's normal to want to fill up this void by finding ways to get back together with your ex boyfriend or to find a new boyfriend right away. Do your best to resist these strong temptations.
When looking for how to survive a breakup it is important to face the void, feel all the pain, and move through to the other side. If you choose to avoid feeling the pain, you will continue carrying it with you and it's best to deal with your baggage before you move into a new relationship.
Feel every emotion you feel. Avoid sweeping your emotions under the rug. If you feel sad, then be fully sad. If you feel angry, then feel angry.
Cry into your pillow or the arms of a friend. Let out all the tears, screams and hurt. Fully feeling your emotions speeds up the healing process. Denying them and pushing them aside will only prolong your pain.
There will be many feelings and emotions coming up for you. It may be too much to deal with all on your own. As women we heal by talking things out. If you have a very close and supportive girlfriend or family member, you may want to consider talking with them about your breakup. This is time for you to cry and to receive hugs. You need this kind of support right now.
If for some reason you are not comfortable sharing your feelings with someone in your personal life, there is absolutely nothing wrong with talking with a therapist. Counselors are helpful in healing your emotional hurt and releasing the pain. Finding the right counselor can actually help you speed up the process of getting over a relationship.
Allow yourself time to heal. Focus on taking care of yourself on all levels: physically, emotionally, mentally and physically. Make a list of all the things you love to do and then do them. Fill the void with positive things.
Keep yourself busy and surround yourself with positive people. Avoid spending prolonged periods of time alone in bed, eating ice cream, and watching chick flicks. Too much time alone can increase your chances of falling into a depression or a very sad and prolonged funk.
So get out of the house. Explore a new hobby. Make new friends or rekindle old friendships.
Do a lot of girlie things like taking baths, hanging out with supportive girlfriends, buying a new dress or getting a massage.
Anytime you start thinking about your boyfriend, look at the list of all the things you love to do, pick one of those things, then do it. Keeping busy is the key. You'll just drive yourself crazy thinking about the breakup if you don't take action.
This may be hard to hear right now, but in time you will feel better. Time heals all wounds.
After I broke up with my boyfriend I cried every night for a month. I was so emotionally connected to my boyfriend. He lived in my heart and breaking up felt like he moved out and took all his stuff with him.
Every time I thought about him tears welled up in my eyes. My heart hurt all the time. I missed him and I missed "us".
But then after some time I didn't cry anymore. I didn't think about him as much and I started to feel happier. Trust that in time you will feel better too.
So here's a recap on how to survive a breakup and pass through the void:
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